Mad English girl Down Under

Apart from the time it took me roughly 30 minutes to pluck the courage up to getting in the river (sitting on the side hearing all the rustling didn't help that decision, in my head it was either death by snake or death by crocodile or possibly shark.... and yes all plausible before you say anything) So picture this, Ob is already swimming around enjoying the water as its a bazillion degrees that day, we've walked to the furthest part of the river because I'm too much of a wuss to get in where the other 5 people were swimming. I'm like a jack in the box I think I'm ready so stand, then decide no I can't do it so sit down. Ob is offering me his hand and telling me it's safe which doesn't help as I think if that croc gets him, I really do have to get in and I will go mother bear on that croc. I then get a little braver,  shriek at Ob to swim next to me to the other side (all of 5 metres) then I stand and literally throw myself into the river and swim like...

A few weeks ago I came home to a parcel, now I never get parcels, Sean does near enough everyday but as soon as he's home they're whisked away never to be seen again. So my little parcel was. ...... a pair of thinning scissors. I have no idea where they came from, I checked my ebay account - no drunk purchase made by me (Sean's drunk purchase lately was 2 very bad ass knives that he only remembered ordering when they arrrived) so I'm now wondering if someone sent them to me as a bit of a hint? They even came with a spirit level! The other day after battling with the bouffant and feeling annoyed that my hair is such a mass of frizz I had the old light bulb moment and remembered the scissors. So, out they came minus spirit level and I start to hack away. A bit like Edward Scissor hands cross Britney Spears when she shaved her head and went bonkers. I can confirm that I still have a full head and I haven't gone bonkers (others may argue that) After chopping my hair...